As much as I wanted another child eventually, it was still a surprise when we found out we were expecting. My son is 12 years old so I always had a tiny bit of fear about starting all over. Nonetheless, we were happy about the news. I always pictured me finding out and planning out this cute way to tell my man and our family but things don’t always work out the way we planned. My “finding out” story was me laying in a hospital bed because I wasn’t feeling well and was in excruciating pain and didn’t know why. After getting so many tests ran the doctor finally came into the room to let me know that I was pregnant; he also added that he was afraid that it could possibly be a topic pregnancy and that could be what was causing the pain I was in. We were not expecting that news at all but I was early and we decided not to tell anyone of the pregnancy news until we knew for sure that it wasn’t topic.
A few days later, an ultrasound determined that it was not a topic pregnancy which was a relief but the doctor was concerned about the cyst I had on my left ovary. A week later my doctor expressed that she was not too concerned about the cyst and she in fact felt that my growing baby would help shrink it. Now with all of this going on in my personal life, I was having to take time off of work here and there for my appointments. Don’t get me wrong, no matter how may appointments I had I still made it my mission to make it into work and not miss a day, even if I had to cry at my desk praying that everything would be fine with my baby.
My job started getting stressful and despite most companies expressing how supportive they are of a pregnant woman; many of us know that’s just bullshit and despite all the laws about NOT discriminating against a pregnant woman, most companies know how to get around this. With my workload getting outrageous my morning sickness was hell. I couldn’t take any time off for myself and had suck it up and make it work everyday, then come home and be half dead to the world. Before long it started to take a toll on me, I was working long days suffering from the worst sickness (which my doctor had to change my medication again). This stress started to get to me, if I even tried to take a day off from work to rest it was a problem, my doctor began to notice what it was doing to me. I was back in the hospital 2 more times, one for passing out at work and the second and final time was for chest pains and my heart rate being abnormal.
The doctor informed me that I had to take time off. She expressed how I was putting my baby in danger by continuing on this path. That was a wakeup call for me. I couldn’t risk losing my baby for this company, they obviously could care less about me and my well being. The final straw was me informing my bosses that per doctor’s orders I would be taking a few days off, of course, they did not take this news well. So you know what? I told myself F this! Why am I busting my ass for this company. I couldn’t think of myself in this situation, I had to think of my baby. I prayed on it, discussed it with my family and it made my decision that much easier. Within weeks of quitting my chest pains had stopped, I was getting the much needed rest, my heart wasn’t racing and anxiety went away. I decided to take this time to focus on my health, my son, my family and of course my writing. I am not almost out of my second trimester and so excited to meet this baby who has already changed my life.